FATHER'S DAY – AT 12:08 P.M. ET:  Happy Father's Day to all fathers.  Now, of course, we must be chic and modern, and agree that we are useless and superfluous, and the butt of legitimate jokes on TV sitcoms.

I propose a solution to our sorry state.   Promise me that by midnight today you will make up a powerful list of grievances and anti-father oppressions, which will, tomorrow morning, be turned into a movement.

We will have a million-daddy march.  We will wear silly hats.

We will appear before Congressional committees to outline our resentments, our horror at microaggressions like, "So's your old man."

We will form academic departments.  The Department of Dad Studies.  We will demand that Hollywood filmmakers replace the damsel in distress with the dad in the doghouse.

We shall overcome.

So make this a Father's Day filled with anger toward a society that forces us to drive the car while everyone else is having ice cream and letting it drip over our new leather seats.  Can you just imagine a world free of that?

Oh, and make sure you get out and clean the barbecue.

June 17,  2018